The archive
“Hello,” Bob said as he approached his lady love. “Mandatory couple participation holiday number one is upon us once more.” “Did you get me a card?” asked Sarah. “Yes,” replied Bob. “I got you a card. It is red. It came from Walmart. I love…
If your testosterone levels aren’t high enough to make an alpha-mongoose at the height of his mating season stand aside in fearful respect, you can’t afford to stop reading this column. How did you celebrate the last time you won a “Super Smash Bros” tournament?…
L earning. It’s something our parents think we do every day here in college. It is something I do every day. But it’s not always academic learning. I learn life lessons on a pretty regular basis that usually spur from making mistakes. This is a…
When people ask me what I want to do after college, I always hesitate in my answer. For some, the association between journalism and religion doesn’t always go hand-in-hand. I’m not really sure why either. For me, at the fundamental core of who I am,…
Most of us have had some kind of contact with the Lego franchise in our lives. Not all of us were the obsessive collectors depicted in the latest blockbuster hit, the Lego Movie, but if you’re anything like me, building tall towers just to send…
“Back in my day…” Thinking that makes me feel kind of old, but maybe we’re just at that point now, because I find myself thinking phrases like that more and more often. “Back in my day…” “Remember when we used to have…” “Kids these days…”…
This isn’t what you think. This isn’t some 800-word rant about how I am halfway through my Ouachita education and have a naked ring finger. Though it’s true, this is not me taking up valuable column space to complain. I’m simply trying to point out…
Sir Eldridge Dashingstache crouched patiently behind the curtains of his enemie’s fifth story bedroom window. Watching. Waiting. He had been washed ashore on this island three days ago in a catastrophic mermaid woo-ing accident. Since then, he had spent every hour fleeing a madman who…
Once upon a time, people told stories face-to-face, asked each other about their days, and engaged in this phenomenon that seems to be fading away these days called “conversation.” Then with the new millennium, things started to change. First email, then texting, and around 2007…
In my first few weeks here at Ouachita, I have noticed a group of people that is vastly under-represented on campus: those of us who say “pop” and not “soda” or “coke.” For starters, I was under the impression that “soda” was a northern fad,…
The axe flew just past my knees, missing me by maybe half a foot. My half-witted “helper” stood there in silence, empty handed and dumbfounded, most likely formulating his last words as my face went from malnourished-European-white to fireman’s-axe-red. We had been cutting down a…
Life after college. While toiling your way through four years of undergraduate work, the question is asked of you at least 150,000 times, mostly by friends, family and the occasional pursuer. Some will go on to get their Master’s, the determined will find a job…
