By Kylie Kisgen, Guest Writer
“Everything in moderation,” the saying goes. Practice, school, work, hobbies, down time, quiet time, eating, walking, driving, cleaning, grocery shopping, laundry. Don’t forget to take out the trash, pour into your relationships, walk the dog, turn in your assignment by 11:59 p.m., and get at least eight hours of sleep. We think that “balance” in life is attainable – a way to manage everything, all the time, with the same amount of effort and energy. However, the idea of balance is like a perfectly even scale. Life is not a scale–rather a dance that ebbs and flows–requiring a continual shift in priorities. Here’s the truth: obtaining balance is simply a myth and should not be the human life goal.
According to Leah JM Dean, “balance is a condition in which different elements are equal or in the correct proportions.” Defining personal balance can often lead to subjective definitions. Does balance look like thinking about different things at the same given time? Does it look like multitasking physically? Mentally? The problem with the societal push for “balance” really lies in the fact that human brains are not designed to do more than one thing at a time. Although we think we are able to multitask, or “balance” our time by focusing on more than one thing at a time, we are actually not allowing our brain to focus on completing that task with maximum skill, effort, focus and time management.
Humans need to understand that life is uneven. Every day does not look the same, even if the differences are measured on a micro level. Thus, the human urge to control each area of one’s life, striving to give equal amounts of time and energy to each task, is simply unattainable and unsustainable. “The Myth of Work-Life Balance” puts it simply: “the concept of work-life balance is rooted in the belief that every part of your life should get equal attention all the time. The idea that everything should always be balanced isn’t just unrealistic; it’s a recipe for self-doubt and exhaustion.” Not only is balance an unrealistic goal, it is a perfectionistic trap. Often when we think we can balance every facet of our lives equally and fail to do so, it results in a cycle of shame and guilt, that we were not perfectly productive with our time.
According to “Multicosts of Multitasking”, multitasking is defined as “trying to perform two or more tasks concurrently, which typically leads to repeatedly switching between tasks or leaving one task unfinished in order to do another.” In the pursuit of balance, we disguise our inability to concentrate or complete a task, masking multitasking with so-called efficient productivity. For instance, many people fall into the trap of sitting down to do work, only to check their email 10 seconds after opening the assignment. “When we switch from one task to another, it requires more neural processing because we have to bring back to mind the new task’s representation and then use it to allocate attention to information that is relevant to perform the new task. When we switch between tasks, we lose the benefits of automaticity and efficiency that come from staying focused on a single task,” according to “Multicosts of Multitasking”. Multitasking in the name of balance actually results in lost time and increased mental fatigue.
It is unhealthy for your nervous system to be in a continual state of doing or thinking multiple things at the same time. The same article explains that “when we switch from one task to another, it requires more neural processing because we have to bring back to mind the new task’s representation and then use it to allocate attention to information that is relevant to perform the new task.” When we switch between tasks, we lose the amount of focus we can have on a single task. We often think that balancing tasks through multitasking doubles our efficiency, when in reality, it cuts it in half and causes more strain to our bodies. The article also goes on to say that, “psychological science and neuroscience indicate that our minds are taxed by multitasking. It places increased demands on neurocognitive systems that support control and sustained attention.” Our bodies are designed to do one thing at a time in order to maximize energy, performance and efficiency.
It is important to note that many people are taught to believe and strive for attaining balance in life. I, too, was a victim of this belief. I thought if I could just manage my time better, push through the mental fatigue and distractions, pick up my phone less, try a little more and prioritize better, I will crack the code and finally live a balanced life. My thinking left me mentally fatigued, shameful and with a pit in my stomach as I laid down at night in defeat thinking about how I could have gotten more done or been better in a certain area. However, what’s often labeled as balance is actually just prioritization or trade-offs, not equal distribution. Time trade-offs are what we should strive for, not half-efforts given to each task in order to maintain balance.
Balance is not a place we’ve failed to reach. It’s a destination that has never been real in the first place. Balance offers symmetry and control. Reality offers neither of these. Accepting life as such only opens the door to understanding ourselves, our time and our priorities. It should free us knowing that we don’t have to shoot for perfection, but give time where it matters, when it matters most. Instead of achieving balance, aiming for better time trade-off habits maximizes cognitive function and increases efficiency and production. Life is not a pursuit of equal parts in equal amounts, rather the responsibility of choosing what deserves more.
